Crabby

"I don't like the cinema," asserted Mrs Nunn.

"I know," I said.  "You don't like the fact that other people rustle their sweet papers and that you can't pause the film whilst you get a cup of tea and go for a wee."

"Also, you get fleas," said Mrs Nunn.

"Fleas?"  I said.  "No you don't."

"Yes you do," Mrs Nunn said.  "And crabs."

"Crabs?"  I queried.  "Pubic lice?"

"Yep."  Mrs Nunn sounded pleased with herself.  For the knowledge, rather than the pubic lice themselves.

"You get pubic lice from the cinema?  People are rubbing their genitals on the cinema seats?"

"Some of them, yes.  The dirty beggars."  Mrs Nunn wasn't budging from her opinion.

"And then - in order to catch the crabs... you must also rub your genitals on the cinema seats?"

"Shut up," said Mrs Nunn.  Here endeth the conversation.