Rent girl

With a little bit of luck, we've let the flat. We're still waiting for an exchange / completion date ourselves, but we've found a couple who'd like to rent the one we're living in at the moment. TheBloke (TM) was a little bit overexcited when he found out they are a lesbian couple and insisted we installed CCTV immediately. I refused.

I told Mrs Nunn the good news about letting the flat.

"Excellent," she said. "That's fantastic. And great that you'll have two girls living there. They'll definitely look after your flat. I rented a property to a gay couple once. I have to tell you, they were great. I had a very good experience with lesbians."

"Sorry, Mum," I said, deftly putting her on speakerphone so TheBloke (TM) could hear. "What did you just say?"

"I have had a very positive lesbian experience," she said brightly and loudly.

You heard it here first.