Miss Potato Head

I think I may have solved the riddle of the gritty jacket potato. I am aware that you've probably been in suspense all week about this, and I apologise unreservedly for my slow detective skills.

So, Friday being Friday, and planning on snuggling up with Jam and Jerusalem, a hot water bottle and enough chocolate to fell a small sapling, I thought a baked potato might be a good way to start my evening. I followed my usual potato recipe. I left the butter out to soften. I grated cheese in advance. My food processor (which regularly torments my neighbour's cockatiel) is slightly on the old side, and the blades aren't that sharp anymore. So often when I'm grating cheese, the blades will get stuck, it will make a horrible noise, and I will have to dislodge the cheese. Luckily I am quite adept at cheese-dislodging. I am a woman of many talents.

The potato was lovely. Fluffy and crispy and buttery and mmmmm. Then suddenly... grit! But a hard lump of grit - a bigger bit of grit than previously. This called for further investigation. I isolated the grit from the potato. I examined it closely... It was only a sodding piece of plastic. From the food processor. The blades are so dull, and the horrible crunching noise it makes when whizzing the cheese must be tiny bits of plastic chipping off.

I wonder how much plastic I've eaten over the last year or so. Luckily, as everyone knows, fruit cake is a known anecdote to plastic consumption. I shall go and seek out this remedy directly.