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Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Underground spy

Ploggers, I fear a conspiracy is afoot. Or, more precisely, a-Tube.

Today I was on a training course at The Oval (pause whilst several Ploggers take a pop at the fact I'm never in the office). I live in Bethnal Green, on the Central Line: The Oval is on the Northern Line. This should be an easy journey - Central Line to Bank, change to the Northern Line and off we pop.

Except every station on the London Underground is making the bold announcement, "There is no interchange for the Northern Line at Bank Station, due to escalator repair work." Two things struck me as fishy here. Firstly, as my high school English teacher taught me, it should be "owing to escalator repair work", but grammar quibbles aside, I was pretty certain that there is no escalator between the Central Line and the Northern Line. There is a spiral staircase. And I know it's great to talk up your achievements, but pretending a staircase is an escalator one might call excessive hyperbole.

I was early. (Pause whilst several Ploggers make sarcastic comments.) I had time to backtrack if I needed to. I thought I'd risk it. I got off at Bank and tried to interchange at the Northern Line.

I was right - it was just stairs. Not an escalator in sight. And even more interestingly (OK, "interestingly" might be pushing it), there wasn't a workman in sight, or any evidence at all of any work they might be doing. And I changed without any difficulty at all for the Northern Line. (And arrived very early.)

What is going on? What are they trying to hide? Why are they telling people (lying) that you can't change at Bank? A conspiracy is afoot.

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