In the swim

When you book a holiday there is one thing every woman knows it's imperative to do... Is it to turn the heating off? Or find a cat sitter? Or make sure all bills are in order? No. Obviously, it's to buy a new bikini. This is extremely important as it allows you to focus on the visualisation of the holiday, thus bringing it closer in a very real sense.

Of course, what with my new, exciting bra size and all, I decided to order a new bikini online from Bravissimo, as per recommended by a friend. Today it arrived. I tried it on. It fitted. Lovely. Holiday sorted. Though I thought I probably ought to try on my other bikini as well, to see if it did still fit. I did. It fitted. And as I rootled through my little-used bottom drawer, something suddenly became abundantly clear.

I actually own seven bikinis.

This is quite a lot of swimwear for someone who doesn't really like swimming, and for someone who hasn't been on a beach holiday for three years.

Still, I've heard that the temperature in Amsterdam next weekend should be a higher-than-average 5 degrees Celsius, and we are there for the entire weekend, so I think it was a worthwhile investment.

Not really. I'm not that stupid. Yes, we are off to Amsterdam next weekend... but we're also off to South Africa in February! Yay!

Anyone want to cat-sit a girl kitten with bollocks? Or buy a bikini?