There's no way I can hide it any longer. Someone has to reveal the awful truth...
Canada is boring*.
There, I've said it. Don't get me wrong, Toronto is a lovely, lovely place. The people are polite, everyone is environmentally conscious. There appears to be very little crime. People obey the "Walk / Don't Walk" signs. In short it's dull as fuck.
Everyone here looks slightly spacey like they've been smoking something... which I'd almost suspect, except everyone is so law abiding, the chances of smoking anything stronger than a herbal organic Vicks Vapouriser is hard to imagine. The streets are clean. People say, "Excuse me" if you bump into them. They are like Stepford Canadians.
It makes me want to run amok. I'm not really certain what "amok" means, but it definitely makes me want to do something a bit wrong. Like littering. Or jaywalking. Or putting the wrong type of paper in the recycling bin.
Oh God - perhaps Grand Theft Auto has corrupted me after all. I can't wait till they release a version set in Canada. I'd love to see their bland Canadian expressions as I mow them down for looking at me a bit Canadianly.
* Though admittedly Niagara Falls was quite impressive.
3 comments:
Hi mate
You need to get to Calgary. When I was there I was invited to participate in some line dancing fun by "Randy" :o) yep, they know how to misbehave there!
If the people are still too dull for you there, you could try riding a bull?!
Hazel
Did you see any bears?
T
hat would be exciting I would think.
I could be wrong.
No bears. Not in Toronto. I felt cheated, much like when TheBloke (TM) told me that elephants don't wander round the cities in South Africa.
Conned, I tells ya.
L x
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