The small child was grinning at me. A big beaming smile. This was the London Underground's Central Line, where it is forbidden to make eye contact, let alone smile. I looked away and a few moments later looked back; the child was still gurning at me.
My attention was called away from the situation briefly by my iPod inexplicably deciding to play the theme tune from Dogtanian. I don't want to talk about it.
Hastily removing my earbuds, and studiously ignoring the grimacing kid, I heard it say to its female parental unit, "Mummy, I'm trying to make people laugh. Kerpow! Imagine your head exploding! Imagine falling over! I'm trying to make people laugh."
Not so easy, is it kid? Leave it to the professionals.
Little fucker succeeded though. Whilst my humourless, stoic stoneyface would not be amused, the patronising fat woman next to me simpered, gigglingly.
I wouldn't mind, but the five year-old's just been offered a deal with Channel 4. Still, that's one fewer programme for Jimmy Carr to present.
3 comments:
One for all and all for one,
Muskerhounds are always ready!
One for all and all for one,
Helping everybody!
One for all and all for one,
Such a pretty story!
Sharing everything with fun,
That's the way to be!
If you look up the lyrics, apparently there is a later line saying:
"All for one and one for all, kids are pretty corny".
Weird.
"All for one and one for all, could sound pretty corny," is the way I remember it.
Not that I remember it. Or listened to it in full on my iPod. Whatever.
L x
gosh that takes me back to ITV and tommy boy
i rememeber i wanted to watch that once at grandma's and she said i wasn't allowed to watch 'such rubbish'
you have to hand it to the old girl, she has an eye for bollocks
BJ
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