I am in a quandary. A big quandary. So big it might even be a quintary. That was lame. Sorry.
Here is my quandary. I am a big Hugh Grant fan. Anyone who knows me knows that one day Hugh and I will be married. To date my closest encounter with Hugh Grant is that Jemima Khan was at my graduation ceremony and graduated in my class. This was several years though before she met Hugh Grant, so I'm not really sure that this counts. Anyway, I love Hugh Grant. That is all you need to know.
But as much as I love Hugh Grant, I loathe and detest Drew Barrymore. For many years I have had the cunning plan of attacking Drew Barrymore's pudgy enormous face with a cheese grater. (If this ever happens to Drew Barrymore, it wasn't me, OK?) I cannot bear to watch anything she is in. I think the phobia started at Never Been Kissed, but let's face it, she was fucking annoying in E.T. too.
So now my future husband, Hughie, and my arch-nemesis, Drewie, are now in a new romantic comedy together. I don't know if I can bring myself to watch Hughie's luscious lips touch Drew Barrymore's bulging, repulsive gob.
Any advice would be welcome.
9 comments:
how about , erm, get a life? yeh.....that would be a good start x
Hi Laura, this is Hugh, i want to marry you too and just hated doing those awful scenes with Drew....i just shut my eyes and thought of you
love Hugh
I'm in love with Hugh too! Although he's my second choice for marriage, after Matthew Perry, so you can have Hugh.
I think you should put your hate for Drew aside, because Hugh is singing and dancing in the movie... it looks hysterical :)
~ Fellow Hugh Grant movie addict
Aren't you supposed to be marrying Richard Herring? He'll be hurt to hear that you're cheating on him with Hugh...
And what of Mr Chadwick? How many weddings am I saving up for?!!
RSN
Richard Herring married TV's Emma Kennedy on his radio show TWTTIN around the time of the husband appeal. At least Hugh is still available.
You wouldn't want him anyway, he's become embittered:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ih41uU17P_o
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S24UJx0v9Og
Hazel's advice:
Wait until it comes out on DVD, then you can skip whichever bits displease you. You could even invent your own ending with the wonders of modern technology - if you try hard enough!
I have done you a massive favour and gone to see Music & Lyrics. Here is my precis:
Hugh Grant looks old and dances badly lots. Drew Barrymore rhymes things. They have an argument. Some blonde teenager sings, even though it does appear she has had a lobotomy at some time in her past. Good for her. I can't remember how it ended.
I want those 2 hours of my life back.
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