Stereo bloody typical

My mum's grandfather was Greek. This means that Mrs Nunn is exactly one quarter Greek. She is very, very proud of this. In fact, whenever the opportunity arises, she ticks "Other" or "European" boxes on ethnicity forms. She is proud of her (some would say rather distant) heritage.

She also quite likes the idea that she might possibly be Jewish. "There are lots of Jews in Greece," she says. So whenever she's feeling particularly academic / musical / vegetarian, she'll say loudly, "It's probably because I'm Jewish." She isn't. She was born in Essex to two white Church of England parents, and the most Greek thing she's ever done is accidentally break a plate.

"I'm a bit autistic," Mrs Nunn will say. "I have a touch of Asperger's syndrome." She is also proud of this. She doesn't have Asperger's syndrome. She is slightly over-punctual and doesn't like things to be too untidy. This does not an autistic make. "You're autistic too, Laura. You have Asperger's."

"No, Mum. If I had Asperger's, I wouldn't understand humour. I'd take things literally. I'd have trouble understanding emotion. You are confusing Asperger's with being a bit organised and efficient and a bit arsey when people don't do things to the standards I expect."

"That's because you have Asperger's," Mrs Nunn will say. "And it's the Jewish Greek in you coming out."

How do you argue with that? I just threw a plate at her.